Personal delight.  That’s what I think is hiding in plain sight, behind the “shoulds” that seem to shore of the walls behind which personal delight plays.

Should – I should, you should, they should, he should, she should.  It becomes like a kind of prison.

I hear the should in myself and notice how it squeezes out joy and delight.  I hear it from others and notice how it fertilizes disappointment at best and contempt at worst.  Either way, “should” creates walls – walls between the wellspring of personal delight within oneself and walls between you and others.

On Saturday, I had a birthday party.  So much fun.  Thanks for coming everyone.  Seriously.

Kait's Cake Pops

For a bit of time, I had a little jaunt through a thorny “should” garden.  I shouldn’t have asked people to bring food.  I should have a regular birthday cake instead of bothering Kait to spend hours creating cake pops.  I should have  invited more people, less people, no people.  OMG!  I allow should to sneak into the garden of my mind and pretty soon they were growing like kudzu!

The cakepops were delicious and o so much fun!  Thank you Kait.  Everyone who came was a delight to be around and I missed those who couldn’t be there.  So, I cut back the kudzu of my shoulds and moved on.

But, funny how shoulds work.  This morning, I woke up and started thinking that I have done a terrible job promoting my upcoming meditation course.  I should have sent out notices earlier.  I should have sent a press release to the newspaper.  I should have posted flyers.  Should I keep going?

Ever alert, again, I cut back the shoulds and move on.  I am offering a meditation class.  If you can come, great.  If not, no worries.  If you want to spread the word, even better.  If not, no worries.

I also noticed a distinct difference between the felt sense of “I should” vs. “I want.”  There’s a bunch to say about this.  That’s for another post.  The short story is I want to lower the price.  I originally priced the class at $175 with a $50 discount if you bring a friend.  What I want to do is lower the price to $150 with a $50 discount for both parties if you bring a friend.  Sound fair?  I wanted it to be high enough so people would know this is going to be a class of great value, but within reach financially.

I still have a few seats left if you are interested.  Check it out here.

In the meantime, are shoulds showing up in your life?  Probably.  See what happens if you begin to challenge them and cut them back like kudzu growing in the garden of your mind.

Off to meditate.