Pairs of opposites


Dualism is considered by many to be the source of vast majority of emotional pain and other problems that we experience as human begins. Even our social values show up as opposites: failure / success, generous / stingy, strong / weak, aggressive / tolerant. This list could and does go on and on.

Yet, the feeling of steadfast peace is found when two poles merge. In this merging, there is a kind of neutralization that happens. When this happens, there is a kind of spiritual transcendence that takes place. You experience a kind of spaciousness within. Furthermore, when future situations arise that involve the pair of opposites you have integrated, you have the awareness of a clear choice between the two. The power and significance of this choice is that you are not trapped in the unconscious responsiveness that you likely experienced in the past. There is true freedom.

In many spiritual traditions, spiritual freedom is found in the transcendence of the pairs of opposites, for dualism is at the root of human suffering. Moreover, from the position of dualism, you cannot experience the inherent “Oneness” of Consciousness. When an aspirant begins removing the emotional and spiritual debris collected by our being bound in pairs of opposites, you begin to remove the veils that cover “Oneness” and glimpse true Freedom.

Zivorad Mihajlovic Slavinski states in his book, Return to Oneness, “In all variants of Deep Peat we primarily tend towards the integration of polarities. Every individual process, if it is done correctly, brings about a gradual liberation of the Being from the dual forces it is exposed to in this life. They continue influencing us, because we live in a dual universe. But as the Sixth patriarch of Zen, Hui-Neng points out, when we neutralize (integrate) our basic polarities, we are freed from our extreme behavior and feelings. In any kind of situation we find ourselves, we activate an adequate polarity, which represents the optimal behavior in that situation.

“Integration or neutralization of the opposite polarities which create a problem is the most valuable end of the process. This is the only way we can entirely embrace an experience and solve the problem for good. Therefore, we strive for integration whenever possible.”

Later in his book, Return to Oneness, Zivorad elucidates the wisdom of Hui-neng even further. He writes, “Responding to questions of his disciples on how to discover one’s own true nature, Hui-neng used to give a very simple answer: work on neutralization of chosen pairs of polarities and you will understand the world and your situation in it in a very balanced way. Here is the translation of his own words:

‘He who knows how to use these thirty-six pairs realizes the all-pervading principle which goes through the teaching of all Sutras. Whether he is “coming in” or “going out,” he is able to avoid the two extremes.’

“Hui-neng’s process primarily removes delusions born from the polar opposites. Therefore, we can understand it as the process of collapsing polar structures and removing delusions.”

I can tell you from my own experience that seems to be the case. By no means am I claiming full Self Realization (yet :) ). Nonetheless, I am glimpsing the Freedom to be found in removing delusions through the integration of polarities.

Here is a list of main pairs of opposites that can lead to living a more free life:

  • Heaven and earth
  • Sun and moon
  • Light and darkness
  • Positive element and negative element
  • Fire and Water
  • Speech and dharma
  • Affirmation and negation
  • Matter and no-matter
  • Form and formlessness
  • Matter and emptiness
  • Movement and rest
  • Clean and dirty
  • Ordinary people and sages
  • Ignorant people and wise people
  • Old and young
  • Big and little
  • Long and short
  • Good and bad
  • Vain and enlightened
  • Disturbed and calm
  • Honest man and swindler
  • Full and empty
  • Flat and steep
  • Body and mind
  • Permanent and transient
  • Merciful and cruel
  • Happy and angry
  • Generous and miserly
  • Advancing and retreating
  • Existing and non-existing

Clearly, there are innumerable opposites that you can integrate and neutralize. I find the best place to start is where you are. So if anger is a problem for you, start there. If you feel charged by fear or doubt, start there. If you are feeling overwhelmed by loneliness, start there.

Here are few polarities that have shown up in my practice:

  • Confident and insecure
  • Love and fear
  • Love and freedom
  • I and no I
  • Inside and outside
  • Sadness and ease
  • Anger and calm
  • Limited and unlimited
  • Me and nothing
  • Love and loneliness
  • Past and present
  • Poverty and prosperity
  • Can and cannot
  • Win and lose
  • Productive and lazy
  • Motivated and unfocused
  • Giving and receiving
  • Success and failure
  • Wealth and poverty
  • Connected and loneliness
  • ETC…