It was a dark night in Memphis.  I was heading to the hotel.  Friendly people on the corner greeted me.  As I turned to respond, I missed the curb and BAM!  In an instant I was on the ground.  My glasses flew off my face and my bag went flying.  Yowee.  Kazowee!

Image courtesy of pamsclipart.com

All is well, just a scrape here and bruise there.  No big deal.  The big deal came later as I sat down to reflect on what happened.  I have fallen in the past, on ski slopes, in the back yard, on stage (during rehearsal, thank goodness) and countless other places.  In fact, I remember my father saying that I could trip over a rose in the carpet.  It seems I was way over due for a little self reflection about this pattern.

A practice of self reflection can help us unearth old tendencies and release patterns of feeling and being.  Moreover, self reflection goes a long way towards cultivating greater self awareness.  Engaging in rigorous and honest self reflection demands both courage and compassion.  For in order to cultivate a life long discipline of self reflection, you need to know that you are not going to beat yourself up every time you find yourself “less than” some ideal image you hold of who and how you should be…so you need self compassion.  And, courage, hooboy do you need courage to be honest with yourself as you reflect!

Can you see how this works?  Because if you are going to be rigorously honest with yourself, you need the courage to face what you find.  And if you are going to willingly address what you find, you need to be compassionate with yourself so that you can face whatever you’ve found with a kind heart.

What I found is an old pattern rooted in a fall I took as a child and the guilt I felt about that fall.  I also found a feeling of fear about my body.  Armed with this knowledge, I was able to dismantle the intrapsychic structures supporting this old tendency using spiritual technology.

Spiritual technology processes are fabulous tools that aid in releasing the tensions that accumulate in life and beyond that, they provide a means of releasing the pain caused by being caught between pairs of opposites.  In this case, it was the duality of confidence and fear along with guilt and freedom that were influencing my behavior and my state.

What might change for you if you approached your self reflection with greater courage and compassion?  Are there pairs of opposites showing up in your life that are contributing to patterns that don’t support your well-being?

I think that it’s possible to cultivate a life of balance and peace? Do you?  Seriously, do you?

As a young mother, I knew that to be the kind of mom I wanted to be, I needed to take time for myself — to meditate, to take care of my body, and reflect on my life.  As an older mother, and so much more, the same is still true.  I still need to take care of me.  No one else is going to do that, it’s entirely up to me.  Having learned this early on, I bravely took up the mantle and make time for self care.

One quality people use to describe me is ‘calm.’  I think that the secret to this calmness, this steady state is found in my commitment to these three skills – centering practice, self reflection and taking care of my body.

Everyday, I see wonderful, golden-hearted people who value personal peace and harmonious relationships, yet don’t take the time to take care of themselves and cultivate a better relationship with themselves.  It does take time, but not as much as you’d think.  I think that one of the biggest challenges many people face is finding where this kind of self care lives in in a daily schedule.

When you find a place for self care to live, it becomes part of your routine, no different than brushing your teeth and bathing.  In fact, I consider these practices (centering practice, self reflection & body care) to be a kind of hygiene for the heart.  Just as I would not go a day without brushing my teeth, I aim not to go a day without some kind of centering practice, some kind of self reflection and some kind of body care.

Where would or does centering practice live in your day?  Where would or does self-reflection live in your life?  Where would or does body care live in your life?  If your answer is ‘nowhere’ on any one of these, you might want to think about making space for it.  For those of you who want to integrate these practices into your daily life without overwhelming yourself, check out my 21 day audio program, Reclaim Your Life & Learn to Live in Balance.

Where does self care live in your life?

I’m living in a body that is 51.5 years old.  So far, it’s taken me on a quite a ride.  Or maybe the other way around, I’ve taken it on a quite a ride.  Either way, I’m grateful.  I’ve taken it on untold adventures and it’s held up with remarkable grace and good will…until recently.

I'm the girl in the back

When I was in my twenties, I spent several summers as a guide on the Colorado River in southern Utah.  On one of those trips, I injured my back.  Big time pain.  Flash forward a couple of decades and that old injury is showing up with a vengeance.

For the last couple of years, I’ve been seeing chiropractors, physical therapists, massage therapists, orthopedic doctors…and on and on, as I attempt to find relief.  Relief is slow in coming, but coming it is.

At first I felt a bit betrayed by my body, like it had somehow let me down and I could no longer trust it.  Ever so slowly, I realized that perhaps I have betrayed my body by not taking better care of it.  Heck, there’ve been times when I took better care of my car than I did my body.

Because I have a strong preference for my body to last a good long time in good health, I needed to make some changes.  So I did.  These days, I take good care of my body and have a good team to support me — physical therapist, massage therapist, svaroopa yoga teacher, and ME.  I stretch almost every day, walk several times a week and aim to provide my body with good fuel.  There’s more, but those are the basics.

I can almost hear my mother-in-law teasing me and saying “Well pin a rose on your nose.”

Nonetheless, the changes have made my life better, I’m more mindful of and more loving towards my body.  It’s rare that I take it for granted.

How about you?  Are you taking better care of your car than you do your body?

What small change could you make this week to take even better care of your body?

P.S.  One of the things I did that I think made a huge difference in how I feel towards my body was using ZPoint to help me clear out the negative feelings I had towards my body and motivate me to exercise.  If this sound interesting to you, check out the recording I made to lead you through the same process I used, “Say Yes to Better Health.” You can find it in my shop.

winging my way home

On my recent trip to Greece, I once again used EFT to deal with jet lag.  Greece is 7 hours ahead of my humble abode here in the foothills of the Great Smoky Mountains in east Tennessee.  If you haven’t tried EFT for jet lag, go for it.  It’s easy to learn and works like a dream for jet lag and more.

If you don’t know EFT, you can download the basic protocol, here.

Here’s the trick I used for jet lag:

1.  As you are traveling, every hour or so, set your watch towards the time where you are going.  You can set it an hour or 1/2 ahead or back.

2.  Each time you re-set your watch, use the EFT protocol with this set up:  “Even though my body is set to “Tennessee” time, I choose for it to set to “Athens” time.”

3.  Then alternate between “Tennessee Time” (that’s an example ) and “Athens Time” (another example) as you tap.  Do five rounds of tapping.  This means going through all the points five times.  I did not and rarely use the hand points.

On another note, if you are planning a summer vacation, you might want to check out turning part of your vacation into a little retreat.  You can use my award-winning book, An Illumined Life, to support you.  It’s now also available in e-book form so you can print off a bit at a time and play!

Seriously.  Take care of your body.  It’s the only one we get (at least this time around).  Yet for many of us, it’s way low on the agenda.

Whether it’s walking, running, yoga, or kick-boxing, please, move – your – body.

I’m fifty now and am mindful that everyday my body needs my loving care if it’s going to do what I want it to do into my 60′s, 70′s, 80′s and beyond.  I’m not alone in this.

I also think that taking care of our bodies is a spiritual responsibility and can become a spiritual practice, providing sound loving care goes beyond purchasing the next best skin care.   There’s a lot more I can say about this.  Look for a special report from me on this soon.  And, if it’s not forthcoming….bug me a little bit

In the meantime, I found out today that Yuri Elkaim (trainer extraordinaire) is offering a 25% discount on his treadmill trainer materials.  These are the audio files I used to turn myself from someone who DOES NOT LIKE running into someone who runs and even enjoys it.  Well, I’m on a little hiatus at the moment, waiting for the ok from the PT, so I’m back to walking and looking forward to running.  Even that is a little miracle.

Anyway, check out Yuri Elkaim and his treadmill trainer material.  His sale ends at Midnight on March 18, 2009.  If you decide to purchase, use this COUPON CODE 1234.

And, if you want to be amazed by what the human body can do, check this out, DanceBrazil will be doing a live webcast on March 22.

Cheers to happy bodies!