This Saturday is National Yoga Day.  Do yourself a favor and practice a bit of yoga, either in a class or in your living room.  Then, do your relationships a favor and indulge in taking yoga off the mat and into your relationships.

We know that yoga is about releasing tensions, building strength, and increasing flexibility.  But let’s all take in a deep breath together and remember that yoga is ultimately about union, union with God, Spirit, the Great Mystery.  The physical yoga practices definitely help yoga students release these tensions.  Yet yoga can become even more powerful when you take it off the mat and into your relationships.

Consider for a moment that if what most sacred texts from the Bible to the Bhagavad Gita say is true, that the kingdom of God is within, that God dwells within you as you, well, then take a look in the mirror.  Look at the person sitting across from you.  Can you see God peeking out?

For most of us, we have to practice a little before we can truly say that we can see the Great Mystery of Divinity peeking out at us through our own eyes or the eyes of another.  Loving kindness is one way to practice yoga off the mat.  It helps release the tension felt in relationship.  You can use this practice in your relationship with yourself, with others and even with your own body.

As our lives take place in the context of relationships, relationships can be like a yoga mat that is slung over your shoulders in every moment of life.  It’s so ever-present, you might not even be aware of the impact of your relationships on your overall sense of well-being. Relationships just might be one of the most perfect practice spaces for yoga.

In relationships, your attitude contributes to the level of tension you may feel.  With the practice of loving kindness, you cultivate an attitude of friendliness that can help you become more accepting and more compassionate towards yourself and others.  As you consciously practice a friendly attitude towards yourself and others, the tension within that relationship can gradually release.  As the tension releases, you begin to experience more union.

A feeling of easy calm, lightheartedness, and friendly attitude can be a kind of reference point, an indicator of the level of the amount of tension held in a relationship.  If there is tension, try a little loving kindness practice.

Essentially, loving kindness is the ongoing heart-felt practice of wishing others well.  Just like in the physical yogas, it is something that you practice.  The more you practice, the more adept you become.  The practice looks quite simple, much like the mountain pose in yoga.  In mountain, it looks like you are just standing there.  Yet the pose is very grounding.

In the same way, loving kindness practice may look like not much is going on, yet there is an internal stretching and quiet release of tension.  Much like a side stretch gently releases tension in the side body, loving kindness releases tension in the heart.

Huxley is releasing his tension with his version of Shivasana!

You can practice loving kindness every day by sitting quietly and restfully.  Then bring to mind people you care about and wish them well, wish them freedom from suffering.  ”May they be happy.  May they be free from suffering.”  Then bring to mind strangers, folks you might see at the grocer. Wish them well, freedom from suffering.  Then go through the same process with people who are challenging for you.  Don’t forget to wish yourself well, wish yourself freedom from suffering.  (If this interests you, send me an email and I’ll send you a link to a free recording to help you practice.)

If you find that the tension in your relationship with yourself or others is not responding to your loving kindness practice, it’s not fully releasing on its own, that’s where the support of a skilled therapist or coach can help.  Your part is to show up and receive the support that’s available.  Just as you wouldn’t try to do some of the harder yoga poses without the support of a skilled teacher, there are aspects of relationship tension that call for skilled support so that you can restore sweet union.

We can all help.

Chris Sacca lays out 6 ways we can ALL help.

Haiti, you are in our hearts.

Let’s create peace together, you and me.