Have you ever noticed that when you are trying to make a decision and if you try to make that decision based solely on what you think someone else thinks you kind of throw yourself off?  That’s not to say that considering other points of view is a bad thing.  In fact, I think it would serve us all to be able to slide into another point of view, and allow other points of view to impact us.  Nonetheless, each of us has a point of view.

Reflecting on “what is my point of view?” can open up a world of creativity and confidence.  Instead, many of us get stuck in a bit of mechanical or habitual thinking when it comes to point of view.  We get stuck in unconscious impressions about what our point of view should be or even aligning with what it used to be, rather than opening to the current moment by moment experience of the preciousness of who we are now.

Lately I’ve been noticing how some of my artist clients get thrown off course when they lose their point of view.  When an artist loses his or her point of view, something magical about their art is lost.  In that case, we all lose.  For artists help us all see things from a different perspective and in that seeing, there’s an expansion of Awareness.

Not just artists, but each of us has a unique point of view.  Moreover, if we consider each being to be a manifestation of Divine Consciousness, our unique point of view a precious perspective.  When we deny or compare points of view, from my perspective, we are denying some bit of Spirit peeking out through our eyes.  When we compare our points of view with judgment— one is bad, the other is good, we are only becoming more entrenched in the illusory world of duality and missing out on glimpsing something more Divine.

Imagine the possibilities of fully standing in your point of view while respecting another person’s point of view though it might be different than yours.  What if, instead of having to convince someone else that our point of view was the right one, we approached different points of view as yet another mysterious way that Consciousness reveals itself – no right, no wrong, just a different perspective?  How might that change our relationships with ourselves and each other?

I am a big believer in mentors.  Mentors have enriched my life throughout my life.  My first mentor was Dick Olney, the father of Self Acceptance Training.  More recently, I’ve been studying with Zivorad Slavinski, the founder of Spiritual Technology.  Both Dick and Zivorad have deeply influenced me both personally and professionally.  More recently, I’ve found business mentors – two incredible women who are teaching me how to share what I have to share.  As a social worker, I’ve been challenged to find teachers who come at business from a heart-centered/service oriented place – enter Tory Johnson and Michelle Pippin.

When I’ve asked Tory about some project I’m working on, her first question is something along the lines of “what outcome are you going for?”  I love that question.  It refocuses me back to my intention.  It brings me back to beginning with the end in mind.

Well here’s where it gets interesting for me.  A few months back I did a piece of Spiritual Technology work with a friend of mine, Judith Daniel, that Zivorad calls the “Unification of Time.”  One of the many benefits of this piece of work has been that I’ve come more fully into the present with more clarity about the past and future.   At least that’s how I’ve experienced it and what my clients describe. 

This means that though I’ve had a daily meditation practice for the last almost 30 years and have long experienced the benefits of mindfulness meditation, after this work I’ve found myself effortlessly experiencing myself in the present.  For those of you who have read Eckhart Tolle or practice mindfulness meditation, I trust that you can understand what I’m talking about here.  Another of the benefits of this piece of work has been that I’ve found myself being much clearer about my goals in just about every area of life.  Further, this clarity has not come from sitting down and fretting over goals, it’s been more like I’ve become aware of goals from a purer place within, goals that are aligned with me at the deepest level.  Very cool.

Anyway, back to the beginning with the end in mind.  After this work with Judith, I found myself thinking more and more about my death.  If you’ve never contemplated your death, it’s a worthwhile contemplation.  In thinking about my death, I found myself remembering Tory’s question and asked myself, “What kind of death do I want?  And if I want that kind of death, what do I need to do NOW to set the stage for that?”  I’m beginning with the end in mind — with the awareness of my eventual death.   I’m quite certain that when Tory asks me this question, she is not intending that I think about my death, but about what I’m offering in my business.  What’s a contemplative girl to do?

This contemplation has inspired me in numerous ways.  I’m walking more, I’m coming out of the closet with offering more workshops in spiritual technology, even the way I interact seems to be changing — effortlessly.  This contemplation is putting my life in perspective in a different way.  Of course, I’ve always known that I will one day die.  But somehow holding that contemplation has opened up life for me in a new way.  It feels like I’m living more fully, more freely.

It’s like Steve Jobs said, “Remembering that you are going to die is the best way I know to avoid the trap of thinking you have something to lose. You are already naked. There is no reason not to follow your heart.”

How do you stay on track with living more fully and following your heart?

I have a cracked flower pot on my front porch.  It’s far from perfect.  Yet, there is some beauty in its imperfection that fills my heart.  It reminds me of the sweet container that is my body.  Less than perfect.

My body at 52 can no longer do all the cool stuff it could do without effort in my twenties, thirties and even forties.  Yet, still it carries me around everyday.  It is a container for my life that sometimes feels like a cracked pot.  It carries old injuries and is the container for current pleasures.  Everyday, without fail, it carries me.

I have mourned the loss of former capacities.  I’ve rid myself of the old expectations of what this body can do, much like pulling old flowers that have long past offered their last blossom.  The last year or so I’ve embraced new ways of being with my body that honor where I am now, rather than where I was.  I’m learning to plant new flowers and pleasures into the container of my life.

Looking at this flowerpot reminds me to love and live where I am rather than where I was and where I might be later.  How do you remember to live where you are?  With what blossoms are you filling the container of your life as it is now?

I’ve been taking a bit of a rest from my normal routines lately.  Sometimes resting looks like “not doing.”  For me lately, resting has looked like resting my routines.  When I do that, I find surprises in life that I hadn’t previously noticed.

For instance, I like to walk in the field behind my house.  I have my routine of walking the field in big circles.  While resting that routine way of walking the field, I wandered around in the field and found all kinds of patches of new spring growth, violets and other un-identifiable wildflowers (at least to my eye).  Even more than that, I found myself in the middle of the field laying on my back watching the sky pass by.  It was magic.  I found a patch of space that called for a picnic, all in my own backyard, all this glory from resting my routine walk.

I’m a big believer in the value of routines.  I think that they give Life a container in which to be.  And, I’m a big believer in resting routines to see what else might show up.  I wonder what kind of magic you might find in your life if you rest your routines a bit.

Our lives take place in the context of relationships.  We have relationships with ourselves, with others, with life, with nature, with our work..the list goes on and on.  Relationships can be like a yoga mat that is slung over your shoulders in every moment of life.  It’s so ever-present, you might not even be aware of the presence and impact of your relationships on your overall state.

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I think that relationships are one of the most perfect practice spaces for yoga.  Ultimately, yoga is about releasing the deep tensions held in the body and experiencing union.  The tensions we feel in relationship inhibit that feeling of union, yet the tension itself is easy to release.

The first step seems to be to access awareness of any tensions you are experiencing.  Then, instead of looking outside of yourself for a fix, look inside.  Poke around inside yourself a bit and see if you can find the beliefs, old hurts or future worries that are adding to  your tension.

Then access any number of tools and resources to the release the tension.  A simple one you can begin with a 3 minute breathing space.  Begin by just noticing what you are thinking and feeling, like someone watching a movie.  Just notice, without judging or getting engaged.  Then bring your attention to your breath and take a few easy breaths, noticing the movement of the breath in the body, observing the breath.  After a minute or so with this, allow your attention to expand to include your breath, feelings and thoughts.

In just a few minutes you can release a bit of the tension that might have you in it’s grips.  The three-minute breathing space can be like one pose in yoga, like tadasana, mountain pose.  Your practice strengthens and grounds you.  Opening the way for you to enter the next moment of your life with greater ease.  In this way, you begin to learn and practice the yoga of relationship.  The idea is to use your relationships as a practice mat to release tension and move closer to a feeling of union.

If you find that you don’t really know where the tension is coming from or how to fully release it on your own, that’s where the support of a skilled therapist or coach can help.  Your part is then to show up and receive the support that’s available.  Just as you wouldn’t try to do some of the harder yoga poses without the support of a skilled teacher, there are aspects of relationship tension that call for skilled support.

Do you know?  Do you know how truly remarkable you are?  Or have the challenges of life distorted your view?

I think that in the ups and downs of daily life, many of us just forget how very precious we are and how truly remarkable life is.  We human beings tend to get caught up in the ups and downs and dramas of life.  In this way, it’s easy to get pulled off center and shift out of balance.  That’s where centering practice and self reflection can really serve you.  With centering practice, you really learn what if feels like to be centered and balanced in life.  With self reflection, you learn what has pulled you off center and how to get back, back to center, back to you, remarkable YOU!

A few nights ago, a ferocious storm blew through my neck of the woods.  Funnel clouds were spotted, trees down and rain blowing sideways.  That night, I was to facilitate a women’s group.  This group has met weekly for about ten years.  The intention is to explore how to fully live life from a place of True Being-ness, using peace, love and joy as the markers.  On this stormy night, it was a little touch and go whether or not to meet.  As I looked at the radar and remembered where people were driving, it was clear that our group time fell smack in the middle of  a little window between storms.  We decided to meet.

Sometimes that’s the way life is, we are between storms.  Yes?  Yet, how frequently are you living as if the storms of the past are still raging when the sun is shining, or just a few raindrops remain?  It’s a gift to learn to release the worries of the past and simply greet life in the present.  Even if that present means dealing with the debris from the past.

These days, there are ample resources to support you in learning to live in greater peace, love and joy.  There is support available to help you deal with debris?  Are you accessing your resources?  What are they?  Often, it is valuable to take a few moments to assess where the challenges are that are taking you off center.  I’ve crafted a little survey to help you look at this, it will take less than five minutes to complete.  However, the aim is that in those five minutes you’ll have a clearer picture of what challenges are taking you off center.  Wanna play?  Click here.

I’ve been re-reading a translation of the Shiva Sutras, an text from the tradition of Kashmir Shaivism.  One of the sutras reads, “Nothing exists that is not Shiva.”  Shiva, of course, is another name for all-pervasive consciousness, God, the Great Mystery, Allah, Shiva, The God of 10,000 Names.  This teaching is echoed in Psalm 139 in the Holy Bible, “Whither shall I go from thy spirit? Or whither shall I flee from thy presence?  If I ascend up into heaven, thou art there: If I make my bed in hell, behold, thou art there.”

This God of 10,000 Names seems to have left clues about how to live a life filled with wonder, experiencing the Great Mystery in all that is.  So instead of wasting time dismissing the beliefs and ideas that don’t match our own, what if we all found some common threads and wove those threads into a coat of many colors, a coat that warms our heart and opens us to a greater sense of the wonder of the Divine, right now?  For, isn’t right now all we really have?

One of the easiest ways I’ve found to bring myself back to now is to use my senses.  I’ve found that you can use the details provided your senses to enhance your awareness of God in the present moment.  Simply remind yourself, this thing I see, this scent, this sensation,  this sound, this taste, this, too, is God.  This, too, is God.  This, too, is God.  Our senses can take us to the experience of God or away from the experience of God.  Honoring each thing we touch, each thing we taste, each thing we hear, each thing we smell can bring us ever closer to experiencing the all pervasive consciousness of the Divine.

With this kind of honoring and respect, imagine what kind of colorful coat might we weave together!

Things don’t always unfold as I think they should.  Does that ever happen to you?  Come on, you can tell me.

Long ago, for Lent, I gave up having expectations, not that I’m Catholic or Episcopalian.  I just like the idea of Lent.  (Note to Self, write about Lent, during Lent!)  I found that I was not so successful at completely letting go of expectations, but it sure did make me more aware of the role expectations play in Life.

What brings this to mind is my recent trip to the mountains of North Carolina.  Let’s give a shout out to 75 degree weather!  Anyway, we were staying on the border of the Pisgah National Forest, where I fell in love, again, with trees.

What do trees have to do with expectations?

Expectations, if we hold them too tightly rob us of delight and peace in the unfolding moment.  Whereas, trees, ahhhhh, trees ~ their very existence demands that they be flexible.  The wind blows, they bend,  The snow falls, they bend.  They don’t seem to mind the wind and the snow.

In fact, the wind seems to empty them of their dead branches, revealing even more beauty.  So, they flow with the wind and let go of what is no longer alive.

I think we can learn from trees.

Where might you need to bend a little?

Where might flexibility open the door to delight or peace in the unfolding moment?

What expectation might you be holding on a little too tightly?

How might being a bit more flexible enrich the forest of your life?

Finally, what ideas or beliefs might you release like so many dead branches if you bent with what is, rather than with what you think should be?

Personal Peace – YUMMMMMMM.  Sometimes it seems so very far away, yet the key is as close as your next breath.  When you realize that and take full ownership of your experience in life, you are in for a pretty sweet ride.

When I was in my twenties, I spent several summers as a guide on the Colorado River in southern Utah.  I’m still unpacking what I learned on the river and from the desert in those summers.  One perfectly obvious lesson came from packing and unpacking my boat.  I was responsible for my boat.  Of course, I could ask for help and it was there in a skinny minute.  But when it came time to get on the river, the oars were in MY hands.

It was up to me to make sure that the boat was balanced.  And we all know that a balanced boat makes for a smoother ride.  It was up to me to stay in the current and navigate the rapids.  How this translates today is that I can pack the boat of my life with all kinds of activities, people, and thoughts that take me out of the current of my life.  And, before I know it, I’m trying my darnedest to paddle my way out of some eddie or I’m rowing backwards through some rapid.

Or, I can get conscious about what I’m putting in the boat of my life — today.  I can make sure that my boat is balanced with the three essential keys to life balance and personal peace – centering practice, self reflection and body care.  I can anticipate any rapids that I might be approaching and make the necessary adjustments to navigate those life challenges with greater equipoise and greater peace.  This is made so much easier if I’m already rowing along with centering practice, self reflection and body care.

When I’m taking care of myself through regular centering practice, self reflection and body care – the boat of my life floats along life’s current with much greater ease.  If I neglect one of these, I’m sunk.    Though I’d really like to unpack this topic more completely, a blog post just doesn’t lend itself to this exploration.  That’s why I created the Reclaim Your Life 21 Day Challenge.  Stay tuned.  I’ll tell you more later.

In the meantime, what about you?  How’s the boat of your life packed today?  Are you making sure to pack your boat well?  What one thing can you do today that will help you feel more centered?